At my local Walmart is a MTF transwoman who works as a cashier. I do not live in a city. I live in a rural area and drive 20 minutes to this small town Walmart. So does she probably. She has an adam’s apple, patches where hair still grows in spite of the drugs she takes so by a certain point in every single day this woman has facial hair. Her hairline is still that of a man’s and she keeps her eyes down as she checks you out.
That, to me, is “brave.”
Getting up and going to work every day in a place where you will be scrutinized over and over–no matter what you do or how you act,… is brave. Oh sure, there will be people who sympathize and are nice but she’s treated differently. I always am “extra” nice, but that’s even treating her differently. Humans are the product of 100’s of thousands of years of evolution and profiling/scrutiny is part of being a predator. People will always notice differences, be it super beauty, a misplaced mole, a derp eye or an adam’s apple and there is nothing to be done about it. That is reaction #1.
This woman didn’t have $70k for facial feminization surgery or an extra $20k for boobs. She has whatever boobs came in as a result of hormones, and she has whatever softening of features the hormones provide. Everyone looks at her, everyone knows that this was a man who is transitioning, and everyone “wonders.” I admit that I do wonder if she has male organs (probably) because I cannot help myself. I want to be better, but I’m not.
This is her life every single day.
My friend Name Withheld has a student loan’s worth of expenses to pay off her surgery and laser treatment, but if I’m 100% honest you can also still tell by looking at her. Her life daily is to have people “know.” Because she also can’t have the benefit of the best plastic surgeons, Annie Liebowitz taking her picture, and the hammering support of a 90% progressive-run press she has no one to run cover for her transition.
These transwomen are brave.
So when I read Laverne Cox, someone else with the best wig stylists, makeup artists, plastic surgeons, etc on the cover of Entertainment Weekly talking about the Transformation of America, where she calls Caitlyn brave i don’t gush and fall over myself like everyone else seems to. I start to think that Laverne is more clueless than I used to.
She’s not brave. She has had as many kids as Michelle Duggar, all of them left behind and many still bitter about her lack of contact as she moved into the Kardassian Klan. She was a failure to the kids she has since one of them has been banged by a 25 year old married man with a kid since she was 16 years old if his twitter account was accurate. She lied to her last wife for 23 years of marriage, and suddenly comes out when it is no longer worrisome and with every magazine in the world pimping you hard and calling you beautiful, with ESPN giving her a high five when she hasn’t run a mile since the 70’s over cancer patients, vet amputees in triathalons, …I can’t anymore.
You know who is a brave transwoman?
Exposes the US government’s bullshit, goes to prison, and the last and only picture of her as a woman that is immortalized is that of a black and white car photo where she wears a bad wig. No surgery, no Annie Liebowitz, no Laverne Cox interview.
Just jail time and people forgetting about her.
So, call me a bitch, call me a bigot, call me done.